Okay

So this is the REAL me.
I'm shy, i'm insecure. I do NOT trust people easily.
I'm a jealous fuck, i love attention.
I get upset real easy, but i wont show it.
I have a billion and one flaws, i don't like looking at myself.
I'm fucking shit scared of clowns.
I don't LOVE anyone easily, and i find it hard to let go.
I have anger issues, i get worked up too easily.
I bite my lip piercings when i'm nervous.
I hate being belittled, i hate being made fun of.
I never cry, but lately i have been.
I hate when that girl breaks my heart over and over.

I'm nowhere near being perfect, i'm a screwup and thats the way i've always been.
I'm not looking for sympathy, just a little understanding.

I'm sick of being that guy that i'm not anymore.
I couldn't give a fuck about life anymore. I've grown up.
I'll live however the fuck i want to.

Never

I never thought i'd be so fucking lost. No direction, nothing in front of me.
The last few days have been the worst of my life, losing everything ive come to love in a few minutes. Lately i've been hit hard with everything, the girl wants nothing to do with me now. I have no direction in life, i'm almost fucking 20 and i dunno what i'm doing.

I'm quite sick if being called a failure, a waste of space. I'm trying my best to be somebody i'm not.
I'm changing and it's not fun.
I have a big problem with alcohol and drugs atm. If anything gets hard i turn to them.

All i need is someone to be there, to talk to me. I hate being alone.
I still have nothing ):